Over the last ten years, would you rather have had your team be the Baltimore Ravens (née Cleveland Browns) and have a Super Bowl win with Trent Stupid Dilfer as your quarterback?  Or what about the New York Ginas, with a Super Eli Manning LuckyBowl trophy?

Why are the people who complain so much about not getting the big prize are so much louder than the ones who love the fact that we have NOT been the Buccaneers, or the 49ers, or the Lions over the last 10 years.

I know why.  Because we also haven’t been the Patriots.  Or the Steelers.  And that’s what we really want.

Why is the other side of Pennsylvania so damn lucky?  They draft a certifiable imbecile as their quarterback and hire a 17 year coach, and they’re always getting to do what we want the Eagles to do.

Sigh.

I’m gonna go hate on Eli Manning.  That’ll make me feel better.

• Never winning a playoff game  (fog bowl still boils my blood)

• The complete lack of a running game (it being a big deal when Keith Byars managed a 4 yard run)

• The complete lack of an offensive line (Antone Davis anyone?  Ooo and Mike Schad!)

• Ditto pretty much every aspect of our team except for the defense and the QB

Ahh yes, that defense.  I still believe firmly it’s the best defense in the history of the league, but what the hell do I know.

Anyway, the point of this post was to tell a little story that I think I may have already told, but it’s awesome so here it is again.

Buddy's Watchin' You!

So I was at training camp, on that shitty practice field they used to have next to the Vet, with my Pop Pop.  This must have been 1990, a year or two before Jerome died.   It was the golden era of Gang Green, everybody was there: Erik Allen, Seth, Clyde, Wes, Andre, Reggie, Jerome.   The coolest thing is that you could just literally wander around among the guys as they were practicing.  It was such a loose atmosphere– Keith Byars would be catching passes from Matt Cavanaugh and you’d have to jump out of the way.

So we’re standing there at one point, and Buddy goes walking past us towards the porta-potties.  He goes inside, and I look over and see Jerome and Reggie standing there watching him and whispering to each other.  When Buddy closes the door, the two of them sneak over to the porta-potty, each one gets on one of the sides, and they start shaking the unholy shit out of the thing, with Buddy inside.  This is like 700 pounds of awesome Eagles defensive muscle literally rocking the shit out of Buddy while he’s stuck inside this stinky plastic box.  And at this point EVERYBODY is watching and giggling: players, coaches and fans, because they all know who’s inside.

After a good 15 second shake-up, Reggie and Jerome run off and hide in a big pack of green jerseys, and suddenly the door to the porta-potty busts open and Buddy comes stumbling out.  He looks around, wild-eyed, for the culprit, and suddenly you hear Jerome just completely crack up.  The whole place loses it, Buddy included.  It was fuckin’ awesome.  Those dudes all really loved each other, it was such a nice atmosphere.

I think we need to make a BRING IT HOME FOR JEROME shirt.

2) One positive of the way our season ended (I know it’s a stretch calling this a positive, but it is kindof true):  At least we’ve got some new (and very real) fuel for the Boys-Birds rivalry.  Things were getting a bit boring and one-sided for the last 10 years if you think about it.  We need to get back to the days when there was a real chance our head coaches would get into an actual fist fight.

3) For all the McNabb/Reid/Lurie haters and Birds conspiracy theorists: “Sometimes, people, an insufficient pass rush and a fractured O-line are exactly and only what they appear to be.” This is a very, very smart quote from Ahab on philly.com in response to a very, very shitty article by John Gonzalez.  Wonderful point, Ahab.  Why people feel the need to shift blame away from the real reasons why our season fell apart and toward the typical McNabb/Reid/Lurie blame-game totally escapes me.  Maybe because it takes a small amount of focus and concentration to actually think about why our team was having trouble (see #4), while it’s a lot easier and less time-consuming to just follow the “I hate McNabb because he smiles” gut reaction.

4) It’s a lot easier to stomach these losses when you take a second to understand why they happen.  A lot of it is just luck, ladies and gentlemen: as in, injuries to your starting MLB and center.  Find me a super bowl winning team who lost their starting MLB and center.  It’s just that simple.  But I guess it’s McNabb’s fault that Stew Bradley tore his ACL.

5) Thick and thin guys, thick and thin.  And try to keep in mind, there’s been quite a lot of thick in the past ten years.  And no, not this Thicke:

Birds in the Super Bowl?  It’s happened before folks, it could happen again…

NFC Champs?

PS: This shirt is off the hook awesome.  We paid and arm and a leg for it, but whoever ends up with it is gonna be a real proud bird.

That’s a Philly song, not a freakin’ Minnesota song. Everybody’s knows about Philly Soul– “Minnesota Soul” is like a fat swedish guy with pigtails yodeling in the snow.

Now I hope the Phillies play the Twins in the World Series and win in Philly and play that shit in OUR HOUSE and rub it in their faces.

Stupid Minnesotan song co-opting a-holes…

DOLPHINS SINCE DAN MARINO:
- 14 Different starting QBs
- 1-3 Playoff record

COWGIRLS SINCE TROY AIKMAN:
- 10 Different starting QBs
- 0-3 Playoff record

BRONCOS SINCE JOHN ELWAY:
- 9 Different starting QBs
- 1-2 Playoff record

49ERS SINCE STEVE YOUNG:
- 9 Different starting QBs
- 1-2 Playoff record

BILLS SINCE JIM KELLY:
- 8 Different starting QBs
- 0-2 Playoff record

Point is: when you’ve got somebody who wins games, who wins PLAYOFF games (yeah yeah but not Super Bowls, but lots and lots of regular season & playoff games), thinking you can just replace him and continue with the same level of success is kindof nuts.  Not kindof nuts, it IS nuts.

You’re nuts, McNabb haters.

PS: Did yous guys see how DeSean puked after his flipped out touchdown?  Think he’s a pussy?

Here’s the quote from Big Red:
“I just wanted to see where he was at. I wanted to see him move around a little bit, which I thought he did a good job with,” Reid said. “I haven’t made any decisions on it. I think he felt a little better physically than he did last time when he was here.”

Trott, back in the Birds Nest?