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To continue the birds discussion from yesterday – The declarations of “we’re gonna be awesome” or “this will end badly” are both kindof pointless. None of us really has any idea what’s going to happen this season. One thing that’s unarguable is that it’ll be interesting to see all these new players give it a shot.

We, for one, can’t wait. It’s your choice to look forward to that, or to start whining about the team before they’ve even played a down. And if you choose the latter, thank god we don’t have to sit down to dinner with you every night. Must be brutal.

As for “Great White Hope” story – who cares if Kolb is white? We don’t care that Kolb is white or DeSean is black any more than we care that Reno Mahe is polynesian. Reno Mahe sucked, that’s all we cared about. People hope Kolb will be good because they want the Eagles to be good. People say he’s gonna suck because somebody pissed in their Cheerios this morning.

As for “slim chances that he’ll be Aaron Rodgers” & “no coach has drafted 2 franchise QBs” – both these things are statistically true. But pulling out those stats is like pointing out “the Phillies are historically 122-230 against the Diamondbacks in the month of July” or whatever… does that have anything to do with what happens in the game tonight? Do you honestly feel like the Eagles have less of a chance of beating a team on a particular Monday night just because they have historically lost to that team on Monday nights?

Wait and see, hope for the best- that’s what we say… There are certainly as many positive question marks on this team as there are negative ones. If the chips all fall in the right way, we could be awesome. If they all fall off the table, we could be terrible.

For now, this sums up our philosophy on the 2010 Philadelphia Eagles:

Go birds!

Eagles Two Tone Sweater

My dog just stepped on my foot.   Fire Andy Reid! I got a parking ticket.  Joe Banner is the devil! I got toothpaste on my sweater.  The Eagles front office is the worst in football! We’ve made the playoffs for 8 of the last 10 years.  I hate everything!

It’s a real testament to what unbelievably negative people our city is chock full of that we can’t even talk about Brian Westbrook’s career without people yelping on and on about firing Andy Reid.  ANDY REID DISCOVERED BRIAN WESTBROOK AND GAVE HIM HIS CAREER FOLKS.

Pop quiz: what’s more boring than watching paint dry?  Listening to McNabb/Reid/Banner haters spew on and on and ignore all the actual good things they’ve done for this team and this city (i.e. 8 playoff teams in the past 10 years).  Sure they make mistakes (like all football front offices), but if you guys were as loud about the good moves they make (last year’s draft, for example) it would be obvious that you were actually paying attention and didn’t just need something to bitch about.

Let it go!  Cheer the hell up, we’re not the Lions!  Or the Redskins, or the Panthers, or the Falcons, or the Cowboys, or the 49ers, or the Chargers, or all the other teams you definitely would not rather have.

I know a guy that actually didn’t know we were in the playoffs this past year because he was too busy setting up a protest tent camp outside of Jeff Lurie’s house, and couldn’t get the mobile Directv dish going.

Have been doing a lot of reminiscing lately about the Buddy Ryan years, what with Rex in the playoffs with the other green team.  It’s funny how fondly we all look back on those days now, even though at the time there were a lot of things to gripe about.  Makes me think how much everybody’s going to miss Reid, McNabb and going to the playoffs every year when we eventually hit a serious downturn.   Ah yes but it’s so much easier to remember Reggie and Jerome and Seth and to forget about things like…

• Never winning a playoff game  (fog bowl still boils my blood)

• The complete lack of a running game (it being a big deal when Keith Byars managed a 4 yard run)

• The complete lack of an offensive line (Antone Davis anyone?  Ooo and Mike Schad!)

• Ditto pretty much every aspect of our team except for the defense and the QB

Ahh yes, that defense.  I still believe firmly it’s the best defense in the history of the league, but what the hell do I know.

Anyway, the point of this post was to tell a little story that I think I may have already told, but it’s awesome so here it is again.

Buddy's Watchin' You!

So I was at training camp, on that shitty practice field they used to have next to the Vet, with my Pop Pop.  This must have been 1990, a year or two before Jerome died.   It was the golden era of Gang Green, everybody was there: Erik Allen, Seth, Clyde, Wes, Andre, Reggie, Jerome.   The coolest thing is that you could just literally wander around among the guys as they were practicing.  It was such a loose atmosphere– Keith Byars would be catching passes from Matt Cavanaugh and you’d have to jump out of the way.

So we’re standing there at one point, and Buddy goes walking past us towards the porta-potties.  He goes inside, and I look over and see Jerome and Reggie standing there watching him and whispering to each other.  When Buddy closes the door, the two of them sneak over to the porta-potty, each one gets on one of the sides, and they start shaking the unholy shit out of the thing, with Buddy inside.  This is like 700 pounds of awesome Eagles defensive muscle literally rocking the shit out of Buddy while he’s stuck inside this stinky plastic box.  And at this point EVERYBODY is watching and giggling: players, coaches and fans, because they all know who’s inside.

After a good 15 second shake-up, Reggie and Jerome run off and hide in a big pack of green jerseys, and suddenly the door to the porta-potty busts open and Buddy comes stumbling out.  He looks around, wild-eyed, for the culprit, and suddenly you hear Jerome just completely crack up.  The whole place loses it, Buddy included.  It was fuckin’ awesome.  Those dudes all really loved each other, it was such a nice atmosphere.

I think we need to make a BRING IT HOME FOR JEROME shirt.

Just found these two items today for Ye Olde Philavania Vintage Shoppe… they came from different places but they’re basically the same design and they’re both from the Birds’ first Super Bowl year.  Maybe I’m just grasping for positive signs, but I’m filing this one in the “POSITIVE OMEN” category.

Birds in the Super Bowl?  It’s happened before folks, it could happen again…

NFC Champs?

PS: This shirt is off the hook awesome.  We paid and arm and a leg for it, but whoever ends up with it is gonna be a real proud bird.

I’m tempted to listen to 610 later today, just to hear the haters manage to find something to whine about on a day when the Eagles win 34-7. Because you know they will.

So, in the spirit of mindless hating, let’s ignore that awesome win and cover the bases for all the haters out there:

“Lurie doesn’t care about winning, just looking good & making money, Banner is the worst front office guy in the league & is secretly the Incredible Hulk, McNabb is a barfing front office puppet, and Fat Andy is the worst game managing coach in the history of pro football.”

Hold on wait, there should be more spelling mistakes… “We nver shudda let Dawk go, were the worst drafting team in all uf sports, and I totally don care about how manny times we made it to the playoffs cuz winning any game other than the Super Bowl doesn’t matter because I dont watch the reglar seeson or playofs only the Super Bowl. I only accep tha BEST, and any a yous who likes winnin games and goin to da playoffs pretty much every year since andy reid has ben are coach are just brainwashed front office drones.”

Oh yeah one more thing: “Obama’s a muslim!!”

Thanks to our new imaginary alter ego, Kensington Kev the Moronic Super Hater, for these wonderful insights.

(A little background on Kensington Kev: he drinks Piels, he might have a crystal meth habit, and his favorite Eagle is either Andre Waters (pronounced “durty wutters”) or John Runyan. And he owns a Mike Mamula jersey.)

One of these is a picture of Kensington Kev, maybe you can help us decide which:

Kindof a messy win, but we’ll take it. We should have beat this team and we did, so that’s a good thing.

- Offensive line looks a little shaky, but they’re (relatively) healthy so hopefully they can get it going a little tighter. Plus the skins ends are pretty sweet. I miss Reggie.

- That said, our defensive pressure was pretty awesome. Forcing the Redskins to punt after giving them the ball on our own 35 yard line was pretty badass!

- Loved the shot of the sad Pig Pen at the end. I have to admit, I love that those guys dress up like that. I love it even more when they’re sad piggies.

- Final thought: we have some sick wide receivers. I can’t wait to watch those guys play for years to come.

- Oh wait one more thing– love that I’d take any of our 3 quarterbacks over Jason Campbell. Please Washington, keep him around forever? (same goes for Romo btw. Keep Romo forever. Please.)

Got some really nice emails in the last week from Philavania phans. The whole idea behind Philavania was to do stuff for people who love what we love, no matter if they’re living on Cottman Avenue or moved to Texas when they were 6. So it’s awesome for us to hear from people all over the country (and the world) who are diggin’ what we do. We dig what you do too. Thanks for your support, it’s been amazing and we couldn’t do it without yous.

From nathan “a big time philly fan living in the south”:
Subject: keep up the good work
love the shirts you guys make.
love the eagles
love the phucking phillies
love the flyers

fuck the giants, mets, and rangers.

Amen brother!

From Suziee in the 18447:
i have 4 phils t’s and i absolutely love them, they’ve held up better than any team store t’s i’ve ever over paid for for. even in rain. i will always from now on order my stuff from you guys, you guys rock! go phils!!!! my shirts look as good as the day i got them. and i get many compliments on my “world phuckin’ champion shirt” it’s unreal. awesome!!

No Suziee, YOU’RE awesome.

Let’s get the only bad thing out of the way first: Why the f is it that even when we get a win that great, something bad has to happen!?  Keeping our fingers crossed that McNabb’s ribs will come back faster than the McRib at McDonalds.  (Hey maybe we should do a McRib t-shirt…)

Moving on!  Pretty much everything else that happened yesterday was 100% AWESOME.

- McNabb is a warrior.  That touchdown run was vintage #5 (save the injury cracks folks, I’m talking about the run itself).  I love #5, there I said it.

- Local boy makes good!  Couldn’t be happier for Sean McDermott, and couldn’t be happier that we have him running the defensive show.  So cool to see a young, local guy who clearly knows what he’s doing dialing up the blitzes and keeping JJ’s legacy alive.  Nice work Sean–I think we found our next head coach if/when Big Red ever decides to retire.

-  Speaking of keeping JJ’s legacy alive, how sweet was that 4th and 1 stop at the end of the game!?  Starting D comes back in to make a statement, and boy what a statement it was.  Those guys were unbelievable all day.

- Congrats to Victor Abiamiri for his first touchdown EVER!  (since he was born)  Never got one in pee-wee, high school, or college.  Hope he kept that ball…

- DeSean, oh DeSean, you’re a bit of a high-steppin’ douchebag but man am I glad we found you.  I can’t remember ever having a player that looks that fast on the field.  It’s crazy–even when he’s in 2nd gear he looks like he’s on fast forward and everybody else is standing still.  Thank god he held onto the ball until AFTER he made it into the endzone.  Not a big fan of the unsportsmanlike penalty, or the fact that he was laughing about it afterward, but *sigh* they can’t all be Jerry Rice.  Complaining aside, let me say it again just to be clear: DeSean is dope.  Thank god we have that dude.

-  When are the Panthers going to realize that that logo in their endzone looks like something off a Chucky Cheese arcade game from 1992?  Sooooooooo lame.  They might as well be wearing zubazz pants.

- I almost feel bad for Jake Delhomme.  Oh wait, no I don’t.

- Birds are sweet, McNabb will be fine, thank god for the week 4 bye.

- Let’s count our blessings for a happy monday.  Have  a  great week everybody!

Maybe the Panthers should sign Panthro.  Cuz Panthro doesn’t suck.

Panthro Doesn't Suck. The Panthers do.

Psyched about McCoy. Psyched about Maclin. Is Avant actually going to do some business this year? DeSean is SO fast it’s unbelievable. Stop fumbling. Not a bad job by the patchy O-Line. Asante is the new Dawk (not the same, mind you, but he’s now the guy you watch on the D). Loved Herm Edwards on the Eagles Television Network (although he had at LEAST 2 pre-emptive TD calls–take it easy Herm). Loved McNabb’s joke to Spadaro on the sideline (why don’t McNabb bashers realize he’s a funny, nice dude?). Vick… hmmm…what to say about Vick…I said “I can’t believe this” to myself at least 4 times…That laser shot pass up the middle was sweet, but I’m still confused how they’re gonna do this. McNabb looked pretty damn agile last night, huh? He’s the man on this team, whether you like it or not. I like it. (As you can tell by these thoughts, I’m a “glass is half full” kindof guy, a rarity in Philavania.) Oh one other thing: i watched the game out of town on Directv, and for some reason they skipped over about 6 minutes in the 2nd quarter. Weird!! Jumped back in right AFTER Asante’s pick. Gee, thanks Directv.