Quaker State Tee

Pennsylvania: The Quaker State! Give this to your favorite Quaker for their birthday. Don't laugh, we know a lot of Quakers. Quakers are cool. And no, they're not the same as Amish people. Speaking of Amish people, I hear they're really into the Phils and Birds. No kidding. Apparently they read about them in the paper. Seriously, I'm not kidding. I realize this sounds like a standup joke, but I really did read about this somewhere. Swear to Gott.